Wednesday, May 30, 2012

1)Bila orang nampak anda baring tutup mata....
Soalan: Hyee! tidur ke?
Jawapan: Tak la,aku training mcm mana nak mati nanti...

2)Imagine anda bawa tv anda yang rosak pergi jumpa technician untuk repair,dia mesti tanya gak:

Soalan: Nak repair tv ke?
Jawapan: Tak la,aku bosan! so saje aku bwk tv ni jln2.

3)Time anda bangun tidur, dan terus si bendul tu mesti tanya anda:

Soalan: Hyep! da bangun?
Jawapan: Ish,aku tengah tido sambil berjalan-jalan...

4)Kawan anda call phone umah anda dan...
Soalan: Hello?.. Ada mana ?
Jawapan: Kat sini haa ,kat bus stop!!!

5)Diorg nampak anda keluar dari bilik mandi dan dalam keadaan basah-basah..
Soalan: Eh baru mandi ke?
Jawapan: Ehh! Mana ada , Aku jatuh dalam lubang jamban tadi!!!

6)Anda di dalam toilet , pintu berkunci , ada gak orang ketuk pintu dan tanya anda..
Soalan: Ada orang tak?
Jawapan: ( *Suara Kiut* ) Mana ada orang!! Najis yang bercakap~ 



P/s: memg dh lumrah cmtu...~~  (=.=')

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Suami : (Setelah balik lewat dari pejabat) “Selamat malam sayang, sekarang saya logged in.”
Isteri : Abang ada beli tak barang yang saya pesan tadi?
Suami : Bad command or filename.
Isteri : Tapi kan ke saya dah call abang pagi tadi kat pejabat suruh abang beli!
Suami : Errorneous syntax. Abort?
isteri : Ish. Abang nih, takkan itu pon tak ingat? Hahaa….. Abang kata tadi dalam telefon nak beli tv? Mana dia?
Suami : Variable not found…
Isteri : Abang nih memang tak bole harap la. Bak kad kredit abang. Biar saya pergi belikan dan shopping barang dapur sekali.
Suami : Sharing Violation. Access denied…
Isteri : Abang ni tak sayang saya ke? abang lebih sayang komputer abang tu dari saya. Saya tak tahan la kalau macam ni selalu.
Suami : Too many parameters…
Isteri : Saya menyesal pilih abang sebagai suami saya. Harapkan muka je hensem.
Suami : Data type mismatch.
Isteri : Abang nih memang betul-betul tak berguna la.
Suami : It’s by Default.
Isteri : Macamana pula dengan gaji abang?
Suami : File in use … Try later.
Isteri : Kalau begitu, apa peranan saya disisi abang sebagai seorang isteri?
Suami : Unknown Virus. “

P/s: wakakaka...kesian la sespe yg laki dia progrmmer...asik jwb ayt progrmmer jer...haha :))

Thursday, April 5, 2012




Who says our English is teruk? Just read below - Ours is simple, short, concise, straight-to-the-point, effective etc.
WHEN GIVING A CUSTOMER BAD NEWS

Britons: I'm sorry, sir, but we don't seem to have the sweater you want in your size, but if you give me a moment, I can call the other outlets for you.
Malaysians: No stock.
 
RETURNING A CALL

Britons
: Hello, this is John Smith. Did anyone call for me a few moments ago?
Malaysians: Hello, who call?


ASKING SOMEONE TO MAKE WAY

Britons
: Excuse me, I would like to get by. Would you please make way?
Malaysians: S-kew me.

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERS TO PAY

Britons
: Hey! Put your wallet away, this drink is on me.
Malaysians: No need lah.

WHEN ASKING FOR PERMISSION

Britons
: Excuse me, but do you think it would be possible for me to enter through this door?
Malaysians: (pointing at the door) Can ah?

WHEN ENTERTAINING

Britons
: Please make yourself right at home.
Malaysians: No need shy shy one lah!

WHEN DOUBTING SOMEONE

Britons
: I don't recall you giving me the money.
Malaysians: Where got?

WHEN DECLINING AN OFFER
Britons
: I would prefer not to do that, if you don't mind.
Malaysians: Don't want lah.

IN DISAGREEING ON A TOPIC OF DISCUSSION
Britons
: Err...Tom, I have to stop you there. I understand where you're coming from, but I really have to disagree with what you said about the issue.
Malaysians: You mad ah?

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE TO LOWER THEIR VOICE.
Britons
: Excuse me, but could you please lower your voice? I'm trying to concentrate over here.
Malaysians: Shut up lah!

WHEN ASKING SOMEONE IF HE/SHE KNOWS YOU.
Britons
: Excuse me, but I noticed you staring at me for sometime. Do I know you?
Malaysians: See what, see what?

WHEN ASSESSING A TIGHT SITUATION.
Britons
: We seem to be in a bit of a predicament at the moment..
Malaysians: Die lah!!

WHEN TRYING TO FIND OUT WHAT HAD HAPPENED
Britons
: Will someone tell me what has just happened?
Malaysians: What happened ah? Why like that one lah?

WHEN SOMEONE DID SOMETHING WRONG
Britons
: This isn't the way to do it. Here, let me show you.
Malaysians: Like that also don't know how to do!

WHEN ONE IS ANGRY
Britons
: Would you mind not disturbing me?
Malaysians: Celaka you!


P/s : Straight to the point wht?wakakaka! =p

Friday, January 6, 2012




1. Kuih ape yang bungkusnya di dalam, isinya di luar?
Kuih salah bikin.

2. Binatang ape power Karate?
Kuda belang.cube kira brape black belt dia ade.

3. Siape yang menemukan dompet kulit?
Yang menemukan dompet kulit tersebut tolong pulangkan kepada saye.

4. Pintu ape yang walaupun dengan 10 org pun tak leh nak tolak?
Pintu yang ade tulis ‘TARIK’

5. Saya ade 3 kepala,4 tangan dan 5 kaki…siapakah saya?
Pembohong…

6. Apa dia ‘Jauh di mata, dekat di hati…’?
Usus

7. Binatang ape yang seluruh anggota tubuhnya kat kepala?
Kutu rambut

8. Nenek sape jalannya meloncat-loncat?
Neneknye si katak

9. Kenapa lelaki jarang kene penyakit anjing gila?
Sbb lelaki ni kan ‘buaya’

10. Ape beza sekretari baik ngan sekretari kurang baik?
Sekretari baik………………’Selamat pagi tuan’
Sekretari kurang baik………..’Dah pagi ni tuan’

11. Ape persamaan Michael Jordan ngan Michael Jackson?
Dua-dua tak kenal korang…hehe

12. Tukang ape yang kalau dipanggil, die menjenguk ke atas?
Tukang gali kubur

13. Nak mencari sikit punye susah, bile dah dapat buang, ape bendanya?
Tahi hidung

14. Ape persamaan kain jemuran ngan telefon?
Dua-dua kalau dah ‘kringgg’ bole diangkat…

15. Knape pokok kelapa kat depan rumah harus ditebang?
Mestilah kene tebang, sape nak cabut pokok kelapa …gile ape…

16. Gajah terbang dengan ape?
Dengan susah payah……

P/S : haaa..ape tgu lg...korang blh start berteka-teki dgn mber,bf or gf korng..tgk diorng blh jwb ker x...wakakaka!~ =p